Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] I know I may not have the pounds to prove it, but over the years I have had my fair share of humble pie.
[00:00:08] As a matter of fact, the only words I hate saying more than I was wrong are the words, you were right.
[00:00:16] And throughout life, and especially marriage, I've been given many opportunities to utter those dreadful words.
[00:00:26] I can remember being in my high school Spanish class and thinking to myself, what an enormous waste of time. I am never going to ever use any of this.
[00:00:41] And as if my professora could both see the future and read minds, she would often say things like, work hard at learning Spanish. You never know when you might need it.
[00:00:56] After spending four years of my life in Spanish speaking countries as a missionary, I have to admit that she was absolutely right and I was dead wrong. Or even earlier in my childhood, I can remember my parents and my dentists urging me to brush my teeth twice a day and floss regularly and avoid sweets. But what I thought would be a good idea would be to not brush my teeth a lot and instead eat a lot of candy and drink a lot of soda. So that led to a lot of cavities, and not too long ago, one of those teeth with one too many fillings split in two. And so, while I was at the dentist office getting a crown put in, I had plenty of time to reflect and meditate on just how right they were and just how wrong.
[00:01:48] Then when I got the bill in the mail a week later, I got a really big reminder.
[00:01:54] I could go on and on with stories like these. But enough about me. What about you?
[00:02:00] I'm sure you've got plenty of stories you'd like to share, right?
[00:02:04] As hard and even embarrassing as it can be to admit our mistakes and listen to others, the book of Proverbs and this proverb in particular, commends it. In fact, if you're having a hard time remembering the last time you enjoyed a slice of humble pie, then you might be in danger. Because, as we will learn from Proverbs 12:15 and others like it, in a very real sense, your life depends on taking an honest look in the mirror and admitting when you've been wrong and humbly submitting to wise counsel. So the point of this text and the point of this sermon can be summed up in just three simple words.
[00:02:48] Look, listen, and live.
[00:02:52] Like Most Proverbs, Proverbs 12:15 has a very simple structure. The first line is set in contrast with the second. You could even say that the whole book of Proverbs is set up as a contrast between two Ways to live between the way of the wise and the way of the fool, between the way of righteousness and the way of wickedness, between the way of life and the way of death. And in this proverb, we see those two ways reflected. The first line is the way of the fool. It says, the way of a fool is right in his own eyes. The word way refers to his way, way of life, his conduct, his lifestyle, and so on. Everything he thinks, says and does, from the choices he makes to the course of life he takes. It's all right in his own eyes. The fool does whatever he sees fit. And in that regard, fools haven't changed very much since King Solomon wrote these words thousands of years ago under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. The mantra of our foolish culture today is, what you do, you follow your own heart, Be true to yourself, march to the beat of your own drum. These are all ways of saying the same thing, which is, no matter what, do what is right in your own eyes. Whatever you do, do what's right in your eyes. And those statements particularly resonate here in our culture, where we are proud of our independence. But while there is a good kind of independence, the book of Proverbs warns against a bad kind, a foolish kind of independence. Proverbs 18:1 says, Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire. He breaks out against all sound judgment. It is not wise to isolate yourself and be dependent on no one's wisdom but but your own. The kind of attitude that says, well, I don't need anybody telling me what to do is foolish. It's foolish because we were created by God to look to him and to others for the wisdom we need for daily life. Scripture says God created each one of us, and he sustains each one of us. It says, in him we live and move and have our being. In the beginning, God said it was not good for Adam to be alone. And in that regard, nothing has changed since then. It is not good for us to be alone. We still need God, and we need one another in order to have the wisdom to live a truly happy and meaningful life. It is actually a form of God's judgment when he leaves us all to ourselves.
[00:05:48] We can see this in the Book of Judges, which recounts Israel's ugly downward spiral into moral madness. The book ends with these haunting in those days, there was no king in Israel. Everyone did what was right in his own eyes.
[00:06:09] They had become an entire nation of independent fools, or as Pastor Jamie likes to say, idiots. And they suffered greatly because of it. So be very careful about isolating yourself and avoiding opportunities to cultivate deeper relationships in this church body where you will be able to receive godly counsel.
[00:06:36] I know that sometimes avoiding godly counsel in isolation can be the result of pride, and we'll speak to that in a moment. But sometimes people isolate for different reasons.
[00:06:53] Sometimes it might feel right in your own eyes to keep a safe distance because you've been hurt before, or perhaps you're ashamed of some sin from your past or that you're entangled in in the present.
[00:07:10] Maybe you're afraid of what people might think of you if they knew about the skeletons in your closet. You might be telling yourself that nobody really understands you or what you've been through. So you keep up your guard. You don't let anyone into your life.
[00:07:27] If that's you, let me just say you are not alone, and it's a very good and courageous thing that you are here today.
[00:07:38] For some of you, it might be that the hardest thing you do every week is walking these doors on Sunday morning.
[00:07:45] So I want to speak as gently and pastorally as I possibly can and encourage you to not give up.
[00:07:53] If you will take baby steps toward deeper relationships. And in this church body, I truly believe you will be blessed.
[00:08:04] God does not want you to be isolated and alone. Satan may be whispering to your heart that nobody will ever understand, but that is not what God says.
[00:08:16] God says in Hebrews 4:15 that Jesus is able to sympathize with our weaknesses, that in every respect he has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. And in 1 Corinthians 10:13, God says, no temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. The specific details of your situation may be unique, but the specific temptations you face are not.
[00:08:45] The verse continues, God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability. But with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape that you may be able to endure it. One of the ways that God has provided for you to escape from the hurt, from the pain, from the shame, from the isolation, from the bitterness, from the addiction, from whatever it is. One of the ways that God has provided for you to escape from that is sitting around you in this room right now. God has given you a faith family. He has given you brothers and sisters in Christ. So move toward them in love. Even if those baby steps just look like hanging around after the worship gathering for conversations or going to a Bible fellowship group or going to one of the men's or women's gatherings. God designed you to be dependent on him and others. So don't try to go through this Christian life all alone. It's not wise to be Little Miss Independent or Mr. Independent.
[00:09:51] Embrace the love of God that is available to you today through this faith family and begin the healing process.
[00:10:00] Sometimes hurt or shame causes people to isolate. But oftentimes the way of the fool is characterized by a prideful kind of independence. The fool arrogantly assumes that he doesn't need anybody, that he's always right. And that's why he doesn't go looking for advice from others. He doesn't think he needs it. He's a know it all. Or at least he acts like one. His pride prevents him from seeing the wisdom in what God says or in what others say.
[00:10:31] We're all susceptible to this in one way or another, aren't we? How would you fill in the blank?
[00:10:37] I don't need anybody telling me how to raise your kids, do your job, manage your money, or to think about it another way do you always have to be right?
[00:10:51] Maybe it's a performance review at work or it's an argument with your spouse. Are you genuinely willing to listen to what they have to say in ways that you could get better? Or are you just already thinking of all the ways you're going to prove that you're right no matter what?
[00:11:08] Here's the thing. Even if they're wrong about 95% of the things they're saying about you, don't you want to hear that 5% that they got right and how you can get better?
[00:11:20] Listen, I know it's hard to hear criticism. I struggle with this myself. But according to this proverb, anytime we're reluctant or unwilling to listen to what others have to say, or we are acting like arrogant fools.
[00:11:38] But it gets even worse than that.
[00:11:40] It's not only foolish to pridefully do what is right in our own eyes, it's sinful.
[00:11:49] We are Commanded in Romans 12:16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Notice how the command do not be haughty, or it could say, do not be proud is quickly followed by Never be wise in your own eyes. That's because being wise in your own eyes is the direct result of pride in your own heart.
[00:12:18] That means this proverb we're discussing is not merely a matter of wisdom and foolishness.
[00:12:27] It's a matter of righteousness and wickedness, which ultimately means it's a matter of life and death.
[00:12:38] That's why Proverbs 16:18 says, Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall. In a verse that's come up a lot in this series, Proverbs 14:12 warns that there is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.
[00:13:00] Make no mistake about it. If your eyes are so blinded by your pride that you can never admit when you are wrong, then look out.
[00:13:11] If you live such an independent life that nobody can ever tell you what to do, then watch out, because you are in danger. According to God's word, you are in serious danger because you are in the fast lane on the highway to hell.
[00:13:32] And the worst part about it is that fools can't even see that they're in danger. Paul says in 2nd Corinthians 4:4 that fools can't see where they're going because Satan has blinded the minds of unbelievers to keep them from seeing. From seeing what? From seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. Because the way of the fool is right in his own eyes, he can't see the way of salvation through faith in Christ. He's spiritually blinded by his own sinful pride, and he is headed straight for eternal destruction.
[00:14:11] That is the way of the fool.
[00:14:13] The rest of the proverb tells us the way of the wise. Notice the imagery of the bodily senses in these words. The way of a fool is right in his own eyes. But in contrast, a wise man listens to advice. The foolish man's eyes cannot see, but the wise man's ears listen. They listen to advice. Or as some versions put it, they listen to counsel. So in contrast to the blind, isolated fool who lives independently, the wise man lives interdependently in community with others. Remember how Romans 12:16 began.
[00:14:52] It ends with the command, never be wise in your own sight. But it begins with the command, live in harmony with one another. And if we back up just a little bit, in Romans 12:3 5, Paul writes this for by the grace given to me, I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think. He's saying, don't be proud. Don't be wise in your own eyes. Now listen to how he makes the connection between being wise and being interdependent. For by the grace given to me, I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment. That is wise judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned for as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function. So we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. There you have it. The options are be right in your own eyes and independent like a foolish, or think with wise judgment and be interdependent like a body part. We need the counsel of others. That's why Proverbs 11:14 says, where there is no guidance, a people falls. But in an abundance of counselors there is safety. And similarly, Proverbs 15:22 says, without counsel, plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed. Now, there's an important qualification to these proverbs that we need to remember, because we live in a day and age when the problem for a lot of people is not that they're so isolated that they never hear other people's advice. They have the opposite problem. They have too much advice. They've watched so many TikTok videos and listened to so many podcasts and read so many blog articles that they're inundated with counsel. They have so much advice, they don't know what to do with all of it. And that leads them to the paralysis of analysis. And if that cycle continues, it can get so bad that they get to the point where they struggle to even make the most basic decisions anymore. But this problem of too many counselors works itself out in other ways, doesn't it? Some people go looking for advice, and what do they do? They go from person to person to person. Until what? Until they find somebody who tells them exactly what they wanted to do in the first place. The apostle Paul warned Timothy about this very problem 2000 years ago. In 2 Timothy 4:3 4, he wrote, for the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears, they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth. So the important qualification we need to make to all these proverbs encouraging us to have an abundance of counselors is that we need an abundance of wise counselors. The wise man or wise woman listens to wise advice from wise people.
[00:18:16] So we need to balance this proverb with others. Like Proverbs 13:20, which says, Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. In Proverbs 15:2, the tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.
[00:18:38] Surely you do not need me to tell you that the vast majority of the things you hear or read on social media are folly from the mouths of Fool.
[00:18:48] Unfortunately, one of the downsides of our digital age is that people are losing the ability to discern between wise and foolish sources of counsel. It should go without saying, but the counsel you receive on the Internet from a complete stranger that you've never met before is nothing compared to the counsel you get in the church from an older godly Christian who. Who's known you for years.
[00:19:18] And this is where I need to give a word of caution about secular therapy. You're not going to hear me say that there is never a place for secular therapy. But what I will say is that we must exercise great caution in seeking out wisdom from those who do not fear the Lord. Because according to the book of Proverbs, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. So any counselor or therapist who does not believe that our greatest problem is our sin and our greatest solution is Jesus is going to be limited in how much they can help. Now, again, I want to reiterate. I am not telling you to cancel your next therapy appointment. I'm not saying that all secular therapy is completely unhelpful. But what I am saying is that according to God's Word, we must use discernment and surround ourselves with an abundance of wise counselors.
[00:20:20] So where can we go to find an abundance of wise counselors? When you've come to the right place, just look around the room. This is a room filled with people who fear the Lord, both old and young, married and single, parents and grandparents, employees and employers. Your local church should be one of the primary places that you go to seek out wise counselors. And I want to encourage you in this because you're already doing a great job. I see people in this church seeking out wisdom from one another all the time. Basically, every time I'm at parties, I see older women giving biblical counsel to younger women. Here on Saturday. Yesterday, I saw tons of men crammed behind those curtains. Why? Because they're seeking out wisdom from God's Word about how to be godly men. I hear conversations after the worship gathering of people asking one another, how can I handle this problem at work in a biblical way? Or what would you do in this situation with your kids? They're seeking out wisdom. I see all kinds of people going to Bible fellowship groups seeking out wisdom for how to apply God's Word to their lives. I see you listening and taking notes to the preaching of God's Word every Sunday. Keep it up. Keep surrounding yourself with wise counselors here in the context of this local church. And don't make the Mistake of thinking that someone needs an official counseling degree or certification to help you with your problems. Those things can be helpful. But even without a professional title, all Christians can and should be able to give wise counsel from God's Word. So seek out that counsel, even if it comes from your parents or grandparents. If you've got godly parents or grandparents, even if you're an adult, you should still listen to their advice. Because you never get too old to stop needing wise counsel from the Bible. And that leads us to another difference between the way of the fool and the way of the wise that we learn from this proverb. Whereas the foolish man is independent and proud, the wise man is interdependent and humble. That's why he's seeking out advice while the fool is not. But it's not that he's just willing to hear somebody out. A truly wise man has the humility to submit to wise counsel. He's teachable. He's responsive to the advice he receives.
[00:22:49] That's the difference some pastors like to make between getting counseling versus getting counsel. Some people enjoy the kind of counseling that's merely talking about their problems and listening to others advice. But that's all they want to do. They don't want someone to give them counsel.
[00:23:08] They don't really want someone to drag the skeletons out of the closet and carefully expose the sin in their heart. They don't really want someone to to hold them accountable to God's Word and tell them what they should do and hold them accountable to go and do it. They like to think they're getting something done by just sitting around and talking about their problems. But that is not biblical counsel or biblical counseling for that matter.
[00:23:37] It takes humility to both admit you are wrong and take the necessary steps to bring your life more in line with scripture. As Jesus says in the parable of the wise and foolish Builders, everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The primary difference between the wise and foolish builders is not that one hears Jesus and the other does not. The primary difference is that one hears Jesus and does what he says and the other does not do what he says. Jesus half brother James exhorts us to do the Same in James 1:22, where he commands us be doers of the Word and not hearers, only deceiving yourselves. James goes on to say that it's the humble doer of God's word who will be blessed in his doing. He will be Rewarded as Proverbs 22:4 says, the reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life. Proverbs 10:17 says, Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life. Notice it says, whoever heeds not just hears. Whoever heeds instruction. That means whoever listens and submits to godly counsel is. Is on the way to life.
[00:25:07] That is the way of the wise.
[00:25:10] He's not blinded by his sinful pride. He sees his heart's own tendency to sin and foolishness.
[00:25:19] So he invites and listens and submits to wise counsel.
[00:25:25] He's not on the way to death, but on the way to life.
[00:25:31] But how did he get there?
[00:25:34] How can any of us get on the wise way to life?
[00:25:40] Well, it's not by being born wise.
[00:25:43] Proverbs 22:15 says, Folly is bound up in the heart of a child.
[00:25:49] That means we all come into this world as sweet, precious, adorable fools.
[00:25:59] We are all born spiritually blind with a sinful nature. What seems like the right way to live in our own blind eyes is wrong. We don't know where the way of the wise is that leads to life. That's why one of the words the Bible uses to describe unbelievers is that they are lost.
[00:26:23] But as we wander in spiritual darkness down the foolish way to death, a voice calls out.
[00:26:33] Most people don't even hear it over the blaring noise of the foolish wisdom of the world.
[00:26:41] At first we can just barely make it out.
[00:26:44] But if by grace we are given ears to hear it, it gets louder and louder.
[00:26:52] The voice cries out, how long, O simple ones, will you love being simple? How long will scoffers delight in their scoffing and fools hate knowledge? If you turn at my reproof, behold, I will pour out my spirit to you. I will make my words known to you. For the simple are killed by their turning away, and the complacency of fools destroys them. But whoever listens to me will dwell secure and will be at ease without dread of disaster. We hear words holding out to us the promise of life, and by grace our eyes are open to see. We've been going the wrong way all along. And so we repent. And by faith we turn to the way of wisdom, and we are saved from eternal destruction.
[00:27:54] That is the story of every Christian in this room.
[00:28:00] That's what happens whenever the gospel is proclaimed and the Holy Spirit gives people ears to hear and eyes to see. Satan had blinded our eyes from being able to see the way and the truth the life. But Lady Wisdom came and cried out to us through the voice of a preacher or a parent or a campus minister or a Sunday school teacher or a friend. And through the power of the Holy Spirit, our eyes were opened and he gave us ears to hear the good news. That on the cross Jesus took the foot all for your pride. That on the cross Jesus was destroyed for your sins. That on the cross Jesus died. And three days later he rose again so that by faith in him we may have life and have life abundantly. And as we heard that word of Christ through the Spirit of Christ, faith came by hearing. And we were were saved.
[00:29:07] And if you are here today and still lost on the way of sin, that can be your story too.
[00:29:16] If you repent and believe in Jesus, he will save you from destruction.
[00:29:25] That's what he came to do.
[00:29:27] That's what he said. He said that he came to seek and to save the lost. He said, the Spirit of the Lord is upon me because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind. There's a reason why there's so many stories in the Gospels about Jesus healing the deaf and the blind. Because he was showing people physically what he came to do spiritually. Just like Jesus could open the eyes of the blind with a word, so today Jesus opens the eyes of the fool through the word of Christ, the Bible. If we listen and submit to the wonderful counselor, as Jesus is called in Isaiah, we are saved from destruction. We are on the path to eternal life. That's why the best counselors are those who counsel people with the word of God because it is the word of life. We counsel people with the word of Christ because we want them to admit that they are wrong and that he is right. That he's always been right and he always will be. We want them to stop living the way that is right in their own eyes and start living the way that that is right in God's eyes.
[00:30:53] To submit to Jesus.
[00:30:56] So when we meet with someone, we listen carefully to their stories, we ask good questions, we take them to the Bible and we pray that the Spirit would make them look to Christ, listen to Christ and live.
[00:31:15] You see, your life depends on taking an honest look in the mirror of God's Word and admitting that you've been wrong. Because it depends on repentance.
[00:31:28] And your life depends on humbly submitting to Godly counsel. Because it depends on humbly submitting to the wonderful counselor by faith.
[00:31:40] So the next time you're offered biblical counsel that points you to Jesus, humbly submit to it, whether it's from a church member or a family member, whether it's in a Bible study or sermon, even if it's hard to hear, even if it's embarrassing to admit you're wrong and they're right, go ahead and enjoy that slice of humble pie, and don't be afraid to ask for seconds.
